32 Weeks {Body Image & a Future Daughter}

Hey friends!

How is the week treating you so far?

I am doing pretty good (but yes, exhausted, as always. hah!)

And on that note…..

it’s time for the baby bump update!

32 Weeks

Baby Perks is just over 32 weeks today and is about the size of a squash.

Here’s what Baby Perks has been up to this week:

  • Baby Perks weighs about 3.75 pounds and is about 16.7 inches long, and is taking up a lot of space in the uterus (umm, yes, and everywhere else, including my ribs too-yikes!)
  • I should be gaining about a pound a week and roughly half of that goes right to the little girl. In fact, she’ll gain a third to half of her birth weight during the next 7 weeks as she fattens up for survival outside the womb.
  • She now has toenails, fingernails, and real hair (or at least respectable peach fuzz). <–can’t wait to see what color it is!
  • Her skin is becoming soft and smooth as she plumps up in preparation for birth.

And here’s what’s been happening with me this past week:

32 weeks -pregnancy

How far along? 32 weeks (& 3 days)

Baby’s size? squash

Total weight gain/loss: I am +2 lbs since last checkup three weeks ago, bringing the total to 20 lbs (just found out at the doc’s office).

Stretch marks? still zero so far..…which is kinda amaze, considering how much my belly’s grown lately!

Sleep: Great! I feel lucky I sleep well when I do hit the hay….but it is always, always TOO short.

Best moment this week: Every time she moves! I know that is a bit cheesy since she is moving a lot in there, but I am trying to enjoy those small things since I know pregnancy won’t last forever. I enjoy having her in me/with me at all times! 😉

Miss Anything? Same ole: Lying on my stomach. Super intense workouts (like woah! This week I wanted to do a GRIT session so bad). Not having my lower back hurt randomly. Less bathroom trips. And oh, not having her feet (it was confirmed, they are her feet) UP IN MY RIBS. She likes to kick me there when I work too long at my desk…..good or bad thing, I am not sure??

Movement: Tons! But it’s definitely more one day & a bit less the next (totes normal). So that’s fun to be/feel a part of her cycles of wake/sleep active/less active. But no matter the day’s activity, she is always super cray right before I go to bed–and the other night Jared watched my belly (uhhh baby) move all around. So cool!

Food cravings: This week I craved PIZZA & fro yo/ice cream. Of which I got this weekend! I’ve been eating a bunch of everything lately. Annnnndd I had a craving for pop tarts the other day…but I was a healthy store so I found the ‘better for you’ kind. (Nature’s path). They’re tasty!

32 weeks-pregnancy 32 weeks-pregnancy

Food aversions: Sadly….green smoothies again.

Anything making you queasy or sick: Green smoothie. I sadly yarfed one up the other night–it was a horrible experience. I was really nauseated during the day (boo), and then that night while I was reading, I was like “ohhhh no!!” and went running for the bathroom. Ugh.

Gender: GIRL <3

Labor Signs: None. But I think I had another Braxton Hicks contraction thingee again this week? I just don’t know if it is. hah!

Symptoms:

  • like last week…. getting up to go to the bathroom allllll night long.
  • eating constantly-but unable to eat a lot at once.
  • getting emotional & angry about the stttuuupidest stuff. For realz.
  • lower back pain comes & goes
  • a bit of acid reflux–not fun! (p.s. I think it’s also because she is hitting that area with her feet, making it hurt worse)
  • getting harder to bend over!
  • wanting to lie down instead of sit up–sitting is still the worst.
  • tying my shoes makes me breath harder! hah. so does walking up stairs. Apparently my lungs are squished…yes, yes they are.

Belly Button in or out? In. But it is slowly continuing to flatten.

Wedding rings on or off? On.

Maternity clothes? Nothing new.

Baby items purchased? A swing!

Happy or moody most of the time: pretty happy! This week was good–but I also got overwhelmed 1 day, and really worked up about the stupidest thing another day. Fun! (hah)

Funny moments this week: How I dropped a bunch of groceries on the floor….my hands are clumsy! (luckily no major damage)

Looking forward to: Finding the perfect bookshelf.

****

Fitness Thoughts at 32 weeks:

32 weeks-pregnancy fit 32 weeks-pregnancy

{pics are from yesterday before/after teaching BP/CX <–notice how I don’t care what a tool I look like taking photos of myself while people are around?? hahaha}

  • Once again, fitness-wise I feel pretty good. I feel like a broken record saying it though!  Personally, I think being active has helped me so so much. I feel more like myself when I get that endorphin high, so I’m definitely less apt to get caught up in what I look like (p.s. whoa belly, lately!!) & all that jazz that comes with a changing body. (And, from the research I’ve done, baby girl gets some of those endorphins too. Wahoo!)
  • This week I definitely realized no more crunches for me–so not comfortable anymore. I can show them & do ’em about half way up, but it’s kind of pointless, so for about half of the reps I sit up & observe the class as I’m coaching them. It works out fine!
  • Core work is getting harder & harder, but I’ve found that planks/hovers aren’t too bad! So in CXWORX I never modify or change that part on my end. Someone told me she feels my classes have gotten harder since being pregnant….I’ll take that as a compliment! (I’m secretly glad people don’t think they can slack off even if I am a bit. Hah!)
  • My belly is definitely growing, so it’s harder to jump. (We did jump squats the other day)–and yah, being a bit out of breath is hilarious when you have a mic on. I just pull it away from my face so they can’t tell. But shhhhhh don’t tell. 😉

*******

Body Image & a Future Daughter

I wanted to write on this topic because it means so much to me.

Here’s why: there was a point in my life where I would’ve never been able to get pregnant (no period for 7 yrs), and I didn’t like myself all that much. Secretly deep down I hoped & wished I wouldn’t ever have a daughter because I was scared she would have the issues I had…..

Luckily I got the help I needed & took my sweet time to recover. I got my cycle back and obviously am now pregnant. With a little girl.

Funny how that works out, right?

To be truly honest though, I am no longer scared at all about having a daughter.

Because I know that I have a healthy, happy relationship with food once again. Because I love myself (well, some days are harder than others, but that’s normal!). Because I know what my worth is. Because I don’t obsess about food, weight, or how I look. Because I don’t call myself mean names or hurtful things. (I definitely have days where I feel “fat” or don’t love the way I look in a picture–I am human!, but those days are quite frankly, not often & I don’t let the thought drag on & on & on). Because I have a husband who loves me for me. Because I know who I truly am–and that is not dependent on what I way or how I look. And because I am at peace with who I have become. 

Did you know that most women I work with in my coaching services have been influenced by a mother, aunt, sister, cousin, or other strong female character in their life that eventually triggered or influenced them to disordered eating habits? I’d say that for 99% of them this is true.

And that is SAD. But it’s the reality. Mothers have a HUGE influence on their kids, and most especially their daughters.

I cried when I read this article: when your mother says she is fat No, not cried, bawled.

How is it that we’re so mean to ourselves as women? And WHY??

One reason that I see is that we (ahem, the media!) place so much emphasis on our looks & appearances (kate middleton’s bump anyone??!), that it becomes the focal point. So if we *think* we look fat one day it all of a sudden becomes our reality. And to a child, that is NOT what they see. But they DO hear & are impressionable. So if they see mommy looking wonderful to them but she says she is fat or ugly or not worthy or whatever, that child will be confused, sad, and think something might be wrong with her too.

Sad, sad stuff.

Which is why I am on a quest to stop saying ANY mean things about myself. Ever.

The other night I told Jared that I felt huge (I did–it’s normal as a pregnant lady to feel so). He said he thought I looked great and was excited I was growing a baby for us.

Growing a baby. WOW. That is amazing. The magnitude of that was just overwhelming as I went to go brush my teeth & ponder on what he just said….seriously, why should I care how big I look if I am growing another human being???!

It definitely made me stop & think!

I guess to just wrap up this really long babbling is this: I am grateful for the hard journey I’ve had because it’s molded me to become an even more powerful mother of my daughter. One who will love her body no matter what it looks like after pregnancy. One who will help her see what a beautiful little girl she is too. And that it has NOTHING to do with her appearance. Beauty comes from within, and that is what we should be working on. That is what I want my focus on to be as a mother to my daughter. 

Our body image is a reflection of how we see & treat ourselves and how we treat others. 

And you know what? If we love & honor our bodies & souls as well as those around us, our little children will learn to do that too. If I teach by example, she will love herself too and she will learn to care for others. If I eat well & enjoy my treats also, she will too. If I train for strength & power in the gym and focus on enjoying the feeling of sweating & working hard, she probably will too.

The second I freak out or obsess or focus on the wrong things, she probably will too.

And that my friends, is why I am glad I am where I am. I feel overwhelmed & blessed to be carrying one of Heavenly Father’s daughters. The responsibility is HUGE. But I sure hope that my healthy attitude will be an example to her.

I definitely am excited to hold my precious little girl in my arms! <3

******

Have a LOVELY day!

What are YOUR thoughts on body image?? Where do YOU feel YOU learned to love yourself for who YOU are versus what you look like??! Moms: Any tips or advice on raising daughters?! :) 

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Comments

  1. you’re going to be such an amazing mom! you’re already an amazing lady! xo

  2. You are doing such a great job! Looking fantastic. And, I loved your heartfelt words–I think I had similar reactions to finding out we were having a girl. How will I protect her against society’s crazy standards?! But, now I can’t imagine not having her–we are focusing on using words like “strong” “smart” and “kind” and I hope she internalizes them all! excited for you!

    • Thanks Jess! I really appreciate you saying this–and I LOVE what words you’re focusing on! Jada is lucky to have you as her mama. <3

  3. I love this post so freaking much. I often think about how I want to instill healthy habits in my kids without making them body image obsessed. I think you said it perfectly — it all comes down to leading by example. If mom loves herself, daughter will too!

    • And I love you so freaking much….so there’s that. (totes stealing that from you. kthanksbye)

      oh, and amen–example is everything! SO thanks to you for being that example– hilarious & so willing to be transparent–it’s so fun to read your blog!

  4. We definitely are our own worse critics!!! You are looking so so adorable! It is crazy to not get stretch marks, right? I got none and was blown away.

    • that’s awesome that you didn’t get any! I know, I am like waiting for them b/c I just knnnnnooowww they’ll show. So maybe that gives me some hope?!? :)

  5. I adore your attitude towards raising a girl with healthy body image! I think you have it down pat – kids learn by example, so if they see their mom loving their bodies, being active and eating well while enjoying their treats, they likely will too. You’re going to be such a fabulous momma to that little girl!

  6. Love, love, LOVE this! You couldn’t have said it better, and I totally agree with you. It saddens me when I hear little girls (I’m talking ages 6-12 here) say “how fat” they’re going to get if they eat a cookie or whatever. Ahhh it breaks my heart and makes me angry inside. I think making the commitment to never saying anything negative about yourself is awesome not only for your children, but also for yourself.

    • Thanks Ashley :)

      And yes, I totally agree about how sad it is when little girls have that mindset….so so young. SO the parents’ fault (yes, I am going there). Hunter & baby perks are going to be besties & get along great, you know that right?!? :) hehe

  7. Love this! I grew up playing sports all my life so I never even had time to worry about my body image because our coaches would always tell us that when you’re active and athletic that you ARE beautiful even if you’re a tomboy and to not worry about what we ate all the time because we NEEDED those calories! I love that you’re having a little girl, you’re going to be such an amazing role model!! Thanks for the read, and the reminder to believe in ourselves!

    • that is SO awesome of your coaches! Love that example.

      Thank you for thinking I’ll be a good role model-I appreciate it! 😉

  8. Kaitlyn says:

    love love LOVE!

    I teach preschool, and last year, one of my students told me that doughnuts were a yucky food because they would make her fat. This was a THREE YEAR OLD! I couldn’t believe it when she said this too me. I’m not a mother (yet), but being around such young kiddos all day has helped me understand how important it is to model being a strong, confident, happy person, and how they pick up on everything adults say. You’re going to be one fantastic mama :)

    • oh that is SO sad that she thinks/says things like that…

      You’re probably an amazing role model for her–so keep being awesome in the class room :)

      Thanks for reading & your support! <3

  9. I love what you have to say on body image. It’s terrible that girls/women struggle with it so. I think the best thing a mom can do is be available to talk. The worst thing is being scared to go to her with problems… my realtionship with my mom was tough in high school (I admit it – I was a brat). but now she’s one of my best friends and I’m SO grateful to be able to have an open relationship with her.

    You are going to be an amazing mamma!!!

    • Yay for having a mom as a bff now! (I totes did not have a fab relationship with my mom in hs either–I was ‘too busy’ for her. Sad, right?!) I hope my daughter doesn’t follow THAT example…hah.

      Thanks for the confidence boost! <3

  10. Shoot, this one practically had me in tears. Your baby girl is so lucky that even before she’s born she has such a wonderful mama that loves her so much.

  11. Holy guacamole how are you 32 weeks already??? Geez that flew by!!!
    I agree a million billion percent with everything you said about having a daughter. Ironically, mine is the opposite–she’s TINY but with huge muscles–so people comment on that. (Somehow people think it’s okay to say, “She’s so tiny!” but to say to someone else, “She’s huge!” isn’t okay–they’re still commenting on a CHILD’S physique! Okay, off soapbox…) We tell her all the time how strong she is, and we focus on the internal things over the external–like how she’s thoughtful, sympathetic, generous, patient, loving… My husband and I are also hoping that we are good role models (he recently lost 40 pounds and has NO intention of ever gaining them back–our daughter noticed and appreciates Daddy’s healthy life!) through our exercise and laid-back eating attitudes. I’ll NEVER say anything negative about myself around her or my son. You are going to have one strong and confident girl–I just know it! When we ask our kids, “How did you get to be so awesome?” they both reply, “Because that’s how God made me”. I love it!!

    • K I love that you focus on those types of words/things like internal things. SO cool! And that they respond with “that’s how God made me.” Love, love!

      You’re a great mom! thanks for sharing <3

  12. There are so many things I think about when it comes to raising daughters … especially now that I am going to be a mom of 2 girls. Body image is HUGE! Almost more so, my husband and I have talked about HIS influence on our girls.

  13. You raise a great point about confusing a child if they think mom looks great and she says she feels fat or ugly. I think your daughter will be blessed by your past experiences because you will be a positive role model in reflecting a healthy self-image for her.

    Definitely something I need to remember, too, as a teacher. My high schoolers are very impressible, and who knows what they might internalize when they hear me make an off-handed comment. Great post, definitely made me reflect on my self-talk!

  14. You look SO beautiful!!!!!!
    I love your words in this post. One of my biggest worries about having a child (if we ever choose to) is passing on my body image/food issues to him or her. It’s a really hard thing to overcome and I’m so glad that you’ve found a HEALTHY happy way to go through life. You’re going to be such a great mom!!! xoxo

  15. This was inspiring. Thank you! Body image affects so many girls of all ages. It is a very hard thing to recover from, but it is completely worth it in the end. Like you said, you become a stronger and happier individual!

  16. danielle says:

    I love this post Annette, and you are totally going to be the BEST mother for your precious girl :) What a miracle and gift from God, it was all truly meant to be be. What a blessing! Everything you’ve experienced has brought you to this amazing place where you are a tremendous and excellent teacher, mother, wife, sister, friend, and inspiration to all. Your beautiful and healthy spirit just radiates throughout the web-o-sphere, I love it!!!! Big hugs and smiles and thanks xoxoxox

  17. I am an always reader but sometimes commenter and I HAD to respond to this post. I just LOVED it, thank you for writing it Annette!

    I am 33 and am home for a visit with family that I haven’t seen in several years. It is only now that I am realizing how much my mother has affected my self esteem and body image negatively! I am finding myself – at 33! – hiding what I’m eating to avoid her commentary. (Totally reasonable eats as well) She comments on WHEN I eat, WHAT I eat, how OFTEN I eat and how MUCH I eat. She comments if a shirt is a little fitted and shows a bit of belly fat. She is just, SO critical and I have been struggling this week with separating myself, as a person with different thoughts, beliefs and strengths from her critical eye.

    You’re just SO right and I never looked so intensely at this relationship before. THank you for writing about something I am really struggling with right now! (I am loving following along with your pregnancy journey! Your fitness and teaching are helping to inspire me to really make things happen for myself, and to get back into fitness after I let it go during some stressful times. So thank you thank you!)

    • Oh, Sarah Anne, I am so sorry you’re dealing with this. That is so hard! :(

      Something to think about- when someone says something mean, negative, or critical, it is often a reflection of their insecurity….and has nothing to do with you. Remind yourself–it is NOT about you, it is about them/her when she/they say things like that.

      hugs! <3

  18. Hello! I’m a new reader – found your blog over on Carrots n’ Cake. I loved reading and think you’re adroable. :) Totally agree on so many points you made about raising a daughter and body image. I’ll be stopping back soon.

  19. Thank you so much for this post, Annette! It seems body image has been a pretty hot topic around blogworld lately and it really couldn’t have come at a better time. I’m going to the beach at the end of this week and have been really struggling with negative body image thoughts over the last couple of weeks. It’s crazy, because while I can’t say I’ve always been super confident, I CAN say that I was much more accepting of my body in the past…funny how effing up your relationship with food can spoil so many positives in your life. If ONLY I could go back and not have started counting calories. I’m on my way to a more positive (and appreciative) perspective. Actually, when I went swimsuit shopping last weekend, I did not have a SINGLE negative thought about myself…if I didn’t like the way a suit looked on me, I realized it was the SUIT’s fault, not mine! I only hope that IF I ever have children one day that I can keep that mindset and confidence so that I can pass it on to them. I agree with you, it is SOOOOOO important to instill self-worth to our little ones. I remember a few years ago, having to have a talk with my mother about talking negatively about herself in front of my teenage sister. She never even realized that she was doing it until I pointed it out! She has come a long way since then and now I actually look up to her more positive attitude and I really admire the way she incorporates balance in her life with healthy food and treats.

    “But I also got overwhelmed 1 day, and really worked up about the stupidest thing another day” <- Umm, same thing happened to me…and I don't even have a pregnancy to blame it on! Lol

    And finally, you look GORRRRRRRRRRRRGEOUS!!!

    • I love everything about your comment!!

      And that is so wonderful that you had such an awesome experience buying a swimsuit! You are gorgeous heather–inside & out. Thanks for the love!! <3 <3

  20. I know I’m a little late, but this is such a great post Annette. As someone currently working toward being in a happier place with my body image, I completely relate to everything you wrote. We have to be SO careful in how we portray body image to children. They learn so much from us – and negative body image is definitely not something we want them to pick up on.

  21. Katie Williams says:

    Annette,

    So glad to here you are doing so well! I am excited to here about the arrival of your little girl – she is almost here!

    I have to admit that I have been a little surprised about how pregnancy has affected my body image. I guess I thought I was so excited to become a mother and thought pregnant women look so beautiful that somehow I would be blissed-out and happy all the time. Haha! Not so much.

    When I found out I was having twins I definitely started to get nervous about how it would affect my body, and I still kind of am Also, the near-constant comments from people do not make it easier – “You’re going to be HUGE!”, “Wow, you’re carrying twins!?! But you’re so SMALL!”, “Your breasts are HUGE!”, “Ah, look at your TINY belly!”, “How much have you gained?”. “You need to EAT MORE,” You will probably never be small again,” “You don’t look like you could possibly carry twins,” …. the list goes on. Seriously, in the course of a day I get told how small, huge, and generally shocking my body, especially in light of the fact that I am carrying twins, is by everyone and their brother. I am not certain what it the hardest or easiest to hear – it depends upon the day. I have found that being physically active has really helped. I feel so much better mentally after I have exercised (lately I do T25 workouts with my husband and prenatal yoga), and I can tell that it has helped me physically too (my back hurts much, much less when I exercise), and according to my doctor, the babies and I are doing fantastically well – which also helps immensely.

    I am nearly 28 weeks now, and because I am carrying twins I am measuring at 35 weeks. Whoa! So far, I feel great and I hope to continue to stay active. Hopefully, the babies and I continue to do well!

    • Yah, comments from people can be so tough–because they come from ALL sides & can be super confusing. I know you’re doing great with this twin pregnancy, Katie! <3 You've got this!

      Yay for babies coming soon!! xo

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