Hey guys! I am off skiing with my family, but you’re in good hands! Enjoy the guest post
Maureen from Breaking Free & Finding Me here!
Today I want to talk about exploring trigger foods. In light of the holidays and family gatherings that always seem to be surrounding all of us, it can be tempting to overindulge, or as is usually the case with me, to fall victim to a binge. Usually when special occasions come around, I obsess so much about the food that will be involved that I blow it out of proportion in my head. By placing so much emphasis and concern on food, I’m just begging for a binge. However, as I’ve been actively working on recovering from my issues with food and control, I’ve come to a few realizations.
I have realized that no one is perfect, even when it comes to food. Now I have always had an unhealthy relationship with food and so I’ve never really known how to treat food normally. Early on in life, I ate with abandon, and consequently ate myself to 246 lbs. When I began to become health conscious, then health obsessed, I cut almost all of my favorite treats from my diet. That worked for a while because I was so motivated by my progress and loved the attention high I was receiving from losing weight. But, because I became too obsessed with it, I eventually snapped.
During the worst of my binge/restrict period, I constantly lived in state of self-hatred. I felt virtuous when I deprived myself, and loathed myself when I caved and ate “bad’ food. By classifying food as “good” and “bad,” I allowed food to control me. As I became more and more depressed, I binged more and more and felt worse and worse about myself. It was a vicious cycle. It is only recently, as I have admitted to myself that I have a problem and that I am not crazy, that I have begun to recover.
After admitting to myself that I have a problem, I began reading several books about BED. I begun with Geneen Roth who I heard about through Andie’s blog, and while it was a start, I couldn’t really relate totally to her books because they mostly dealt with older women. Then, through a google search on BED, I discovered healthygirl.org, and it changed my life. Sunny Sea Gold writes about BED for young women and her book, Food: The Good Girl’s Drug was like a bible to me. I devoured the book on my kindle as soon as I bought it and I’ve reread sections many times since. I cannot recommend this book enough if you are young woman suffering from BED.
I’d like to share with you now some of the tools I’ve learned for working towards recovery, most of the inspired by Sunny’s book.
MY TOOL BOX:
1) Acknowledge that you have a problem- this is the first, most crucial step. If you continue to deny, it will eat you alive.
2) Try to pinpoint what is causing you to binge. Once you identify your emotions and triggers, you can better pinpoint how to cope with them.
3) Find an outlet. For me, writing on my blog has helped tremendously in my recovery. It allows me a judgment free zone to explore my feelings and in provides me with a wonderful support network. If blogging isn’t for you, maybe try journaling, or meditating, or another calming activity that you enjoy.
4) Find a support system. This can be done through a variety of ways. I have found support through several of the blogs I read, like Annette’s! J In addition, I have found that visiting a therapist has allowed me to express some of my anxieties that I do not yet feel comfortable sharing with family and friends. If therapy isn’t an option for you, trying confiding in a close family member or friend. But please, tell someone. Admitting it out loud is incredibly freeing.
5) Try to love yourself. Yes, I know this is much easier said than done. But constantly remind yourself about all the wonderful things about yourself instead of always focusing on the negative. It will become easier with time… I promise.
That’s it for now, folks! If you got this far, thanks for reading! I hope to continue to explore this topic in future posts. I’ll leave you now with a quote from one of my favorite, female role models, Ms. J.K. Rowling.
Amen, sista, Amen!
Have a great day, and thanks for listening